.mono[b]logue.

As clichéd as this may sound, ignorance truly is bliss. The thing about growing up is that you not only grow older physically but mentally and emotionally as well.

I know my parents better now since I no longer fly off after 3 months of summer break every year. The way people live is a testament of who they really are and I've had the liberty of observing my parents at home.

Sometimes... I don't like what I see.
"That's not right. Why does he condone it?"
"Where's the compassion she once possessed?"
"Why does she sink so low?"
"What happened to the people I once looked up to?"
"Have they always been like this?"
"How come I've never noticed it before?"
"Am I like that too?"
"Have they been jaded by the world or have I turned into a cynic?
Disappointment ensues.

In spite of their flaws, I still love them very much. It was difficult at first. I had to remind myself that they too are only human and "to err is human". On the other hand, I also didn't want to feel as though I've been living in a web of deception; a fairytale with perfect father and mother, and that the 'veil' has finally come off. Not that my parents deceived me, but everything that was conceived in my mind, before. Moreover, who am I to judge when I don't have a perfect track record myself?

Honestly though, I'm more let down by mum than dad. Even though she's a Christian, her values do not resonate with that of Christ. Dad, he has not changed much and even if he did, it's his temperament; very mellow now. He does his best to set an example for me to follow albeit worldly ones. I love him just because he tries.

Negativity reflects my spiritual walk.

Complacency will be my downfall.

*Thank you for the well wishes =)