hopelessness

do you know the feeling... ?

like having something pulled out from under you?
that pit at the bottom you know is there but have not yet reached?
arms flailing & legs thrashing about but nothing to hold on to- unresolve, ungrappable, unbreakable?
and if you allow it to spiral downwards, you know you'll lose sight of the light?

it is a dangerous feeling, far worse than defeat.
it is looking defeat in the eyes and giving in.